J,

I know I should be staying away and not reaching out to you. It’s what you want, but it’s so hard for me to pretend I do not feel your heart beat when I close my eyes. Really I doubt you are still reading my blog. Having you in my life awakens so much in me and now awakened these parts of me refuse to sleep. Believe me I have contemplated your words, your thoughts and your emotions. I agree my love for you, the inspiration that follows your every word, and our relationship is not normal. It’s so beyond what most people see as normal and it’s beyond what they can understand. Honestly who wants normal? We have one life. There has always been something extraordinary about our connection, please don’t turn your back on the gifts we bring each other. From day one I know I have jumped in head first and relentlessly chased this desire to love you. I have been compulsive in my actions and words. I basically attacked you with my love. Time and time again I bury you in an avalanche of my admiration. There so much beauty and pain in your existence I swear my heart breaks a little each time I lay eyes on you. Unfortunately this is where I have gone wrong, I forget about myself as I got lost in those eyes. I lose control and overwhelm your heart. This time away from each other has helped me clear my head. I see you in better light and I’m back on center. I know I don’t want to lose this connection we had. Just like I knew your beauty was destined to bring me heart ache I also know this love we share is a miracle that will not repeat in this lifetime. Let me ask you to forget the eyes of others and all the assumptions the world wants you to believe. Forget all of this and let your heart tell you who I am. I know who you are to me. I just feel sometimes you are not completely honest with yourself about things. If I’m crazy please tell me. If you want me to believe it was all dreams of a madman I will. Just open your heart and connect these dots and tell me what you see. Please don’t over think any of these words, Inside me there is still your best friend, your soul mate. Don’t give up on me I still have so much to share with you, and there is so many great things we can accomplish together.

Extraordinarily Yours,

J