Introduction to Gregory

Gregory lives on his own. Some would consider his existence a lonely one, but from his eyes it could be worse. This is not to say there aren’t lonely times. There are times he wonders what could have been of his failed marriage. He was married in his twenties, but it failed fast and hard, and for good reason. Both himself and his young wife were not ready for the commitment of a marriage. They were young, naive, and didn’t have the emotional mature to make the compromises necessary for a lasting relationship. If you ask him he will say his life is great, and he has plenty of female companionship to keep him warm on cold nights. He has learned from his mistakes, but if you listen to the moments between his words and thoughts you will see the damage that was done. Inside he would love to have the chance to make a life long commitment, but on the flip side he knows part of him was made for that type of life. He has a life full of friends and family that care about him. Anyone that close to him knows he has a problem with commitment. He has no problem going to Las Vegas at the drop of a hat with friends, but ask him to commit to dinner plans a week in advance is more than a challenge. His family is a close one, as most latin families are, but with the passing of his father his extended family of cousins has grown more distant. Event like Christmas and Easter once were prerequisites for all family members, but lately it seems like even wedding invites are optional. His father was the patriarch of the family and his death was the first major loss his family had experienced. He went before his parents, and his death was sudden and tragic. His father Tovar was diagnosed with stomach cancer shortly after his early retirement. A few years prior to his retirement he separated from Gregory’s mother, but reconciled 3 short months after the separation. Gregory always wondered what brought his father back. He deep inside he doubted it was his fathers love that prompted his father’s return. Instead he felt it his father came back out of obligation for his children and not for the love his mother. This always left a questionable sadness hanging of the families house. There were happy times after, but the security Gregory felt in his families home never returned. This happened during the last two years of high school for Gregory. Due to his age and his still developing brain he took it harder than he should have and retreated into the sedated haze of Marijuana. This continued through early years of college. After his fathers death his mother depended on him heavily, which caused strain on their relationship. So much so that Gregory moved out a little more than a year after his fathers death. He lived with his cousin for a few months just one town over, but moved back to his families house a 6 months later. He is still not sure why he came back. Maybe it was out of obligation like his father. He just knew his mother couldn’t hold it together without him and he worried about his younger brother who was still in grade school. Its not that his mother was a weak or deranged in anyway, but she grew up with a abusive mother. At a very young age her mother would leave her alone for days with her younger siblings. These were tramatizing events for his mother and as a result she held on to life a little too tight. These dark days of her childhood instilled an intrinsic strength to her character, but as all strengths that come from surviving abuse it comes with a price. This price always has a flip side, and at times manifests itself as a weakness or disability. His father also grew up in an abusive household. In his case it was his father bringing the abuse. Gregory’s grandfather was alcholic and his arrival to his home was always like Russian roulette. Gregory’s father never new what to expect. In teenage years he was forced into the role of the protecter of his mother when his father came home abusive and drunk. These events also produced an extraordinary strength in the character of Gregory’s father, but just like his mother at times acted as his fatal flaw. His father grew up making sacrifices constantly for the loved ones around him, and as a result he never learned what his happiness felt like. Late in life he got a taste of what his life could of been in the arms of another women, but unfortunately he turned his back on his chance for happiness for the love of his children. Well this is how Gregory sees it, and maybe it is true. Gregory will never know. One year after his father returned he was diagnosed with stomach cancer and three short months after that he was dead. This was, in a way, a nexus in Gregory’s life. If you asked Gregory he could define his life in two chapters. One chapter before his father’s death and the second following the aftermath of his death. Part of his fear of commitment and his views on relationships were molded by the final years of his fathers life. Inside he fears nothing last forever, and he views most marriages as a surrender of the individuals dreams. He was always technically proficient and his parents encouraged his natural talent by giving him a computer at an early age. During his early years of college he fell into designing websites for small companies and this eventually led him to the corporate world. He enjoys the money that the corporate I.T. world provides, but he hates the pointless political games required to get ahead. In the corporate world perception is almost as important as accomplishments. He should be further along his in his career but is refuses to submit to the politics. In a way his has given birth to a lethargic cynicism that has stolen his passion for his work. Gregory does have untapped potential and is capable far more than what he done with his life the past few years. If anything he is a volcano waiting to explode. He is just waiting for that one spark to unleash years of frustration and desperation. He knows he is different, and he knows he sees more than others around him. Unfortunately his life and choices have always been slightly off rhythm with the beat of his heart. Despite being different he has the ability to relate to everyone. At time he uses this ability to manipulate those around him, especially women. At this moment he doesn’t know what he wants out of life, but just he has the gifts and talent to change the world. His next step has to be great. He used to doubt himself and run from uncertainty, but slowly he is realizing that uncertainty is his path to greatness.

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